Do You Really Love God?

Do You Really Love God?

"Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment." (Mat. 22:37-38)

Everyone seems to be quite familiar with the facts that "God is love" (1 John 4:8) and "God so loved the world" (John 3:16). We enjoy pondering the thought that God loves us, but what about our love for him? How can a love relationship be proper when only one party is expressing love? Can a marriage be right when the wife doesn’t love the husband? No it cannot, and our fellowship with God isn’t right when we only say that we love him, yet there is no evidence of it in our Christian walk. "My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth." (1 John 3:18)

The sad fact is that most people, Christians included, do not really love God. This can be easily proven by comparing our Christian testimony to a good healthy marriage. If a married couple truly loves one another, then there will be clear evidence of it. The same is true when a person loves God. "But if any man love God, the same is known of him." (1 Cor. 8:3)

Do You Enjoy God’s Word?

If I really love my wife, I am going to have an open ear for her. I am not going to come in from work and ignore her concerns while pursuing my own interests. If I did so, she would quickly come to realize that I didn’t love her.

The same is true with God. How can one say they love God when they seldom read his word? Jesus said that if you love him you will keep his words (John 14:23). How can you keep them if you don’t read them? In John 8:47, Jesus said, "He that is of God heareth God’s words: ye therefore hear them not, because ye are not of God." Friend, you spend hours each week absorbing the words of men, but how much time do you spend with the words of God? If you really love someone, you really want to hear what they have to say.

Do You Enjoy God’s Fellowship?

Suppose you came to me and said, "Brother Melton, I think you’re the greatest! Your publications have been such a blessing to me. I love you so much in the Lord, but I hate your wife!" Do you think I’m going to be close friends with you? I think not.

Well, many people claim to love God, but they visit their dentist more often than they attend church services! That’s not much love! The church is the bride of Christ, yet most professing Christians are more comfortable with worldly unsaved people than with God’s people. The only things they love are themselves and the world. Such people can sit patiently through a television program, a ball game, or even a dirty joke, but they can’t bring themselves to sit through a preaching service with God’s people.

The fact is that you fellowship with those whom you love, be it God or the devil. Who receives your fellowship? "God is faithful, by whom ye were called unto the fellowship of his Son Jesus Christ our Lord." (1 Cor. 1:9) "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? And what communion hath light with darkness?" (II Cor. 6:14)

Do You Enjoy Praising God?

If a woman really loves her husband, she will praise him and speak well of him. The same is true when a man loves his wife. Proverbs 31:28 says, "Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her." He praises her because he loves her. It is human nature to praise those whom you love. Even God praises men on occasion because he has a special love for his special servants (Job 1:8; 1 Cor. 4:5). If you love someone, you will praise them.

Friend, how often do you praise God? How can you say you love God when you seldom praise his holy name? The word "praise" is found 248 times in the Bible, but how many times have you praised God this week? Hebrews 13:15 says, "By him therefore let us offer the sacrifice of praise to God continually, that is, the fruit of our lips giving thanks to his name." Of all the words which have flowed from your lips this week, how many of them were offered as a sacrifice of praise to God?

If you really love the Lord, you will praise him! You will praise him in the church, in the home, in the work place, in the school, and in the general public. God wants us to praise him "continually," and if we love him we will.

Do You Enjoy Sacrificing for God?

I love my wife and children, so I do not mind sacrificing for them. I often have to do without the things in life that I would like to have because my family has needs which are more important than my "wants." I love my family, so I sacrifice for them.

The Bible says that we are to offer up "spiritual sacrifices" to God (1 Pet. 2:5). The needs of the ministry are more important than our personal "wants." A Christian who really loves God will set aside his own will and seek God’s will. Jesus said, "... not my will, but thine, be done." (Luke 22:42) Selfishness has no place in Christianity. It is an enemy of the cross of Christ. Paul said in Romans 12:1, "I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service."

So it is unreasonable for a Christian to not give himself to God for Christian service. If you love God, you will sacrifice in order to serve him and please him. You will gladly attend church services, and you will involve yourself in the various ministries of the church. You will tithe and give to missions. Rather than jump to negative conclusions, you will give your brethren in the Lord the benefit of a doubt. You will forgive others who trespass against you, and you won’t hold grudges. When others step forward in self exaltation, you will take the "lower seat" of humility and wait on the Lord. Friend, if you love God, you will bear your cross and follow your Saviour.

Do You Enjoy Thinking of the Lord’s Return?

When you love someone you want to be with them. I become homesick when I have to spend even one night away from my wife and children. If I enjoyed being away from home more than being at home, I wouldn’t love my wife and children. My love for them causes me to think of them when I’m away, and it causes me to look forward to being with them again.

My love for the Lord should be same. Every Christian should desire to be with the Lord. Every Christian should be "homesick" for heaven and looking for Jesus to return.

Friend, do you know the last prayer of the Bible? It isn’t a prayer for world peace, nor is it a prayer for anyone’s health, or even anyone’s salvation. After being shown all of the breathtaking events of the book of Revelation, the apostle John sent up one final prayer to the Lord: "Even so, come, Lord Jesus." (Rev. 22:20)

Can you honestly pray like that? Can you honestly say that you want Jesus Christ to return more than anything in this world? If you could have any prayer answered in the next sixty seconds, what would be your petition? Would you express your love for yourself by praying for something selfish, or would you express your love for God by asking Jesus to return? If you love him, you should want to be with him. " ... Now therefore why speak ye not a word of bringing the king back?" (II Sam. 19:10)

This tract has been written for the edification of Christians, those who know Jesus Christ as the Lord and Saviour. If you are not sure of your salvation, please send for a free copy of Understanding God’s Salvation Plan at the address below.

Copyright © 2001 James L. Melton

Additional copies of this tract are available through: Bible Baptist Church, 125 E. Maple, Sharon, TN 38255. An eight cent donation per tract is appreciated, but not required.

HOW TO LOVE

HOW TO LOVE

In 1 Corinthians 13:13, in the Bible, it tells us that faith, hope and love abide in us but the greatest of these is love. God wants His love for us to be an example of how we should love others - unconditionally and sacrificially.

Read this article a few times, each time with a different relationship in mind. Think about your relationship with your spouse, your family, your friends, your neighbors and your Lord, God.

When you love someone, you want to be with them often. You want to communicate with them - in person, on the phone, or writing them and reading their words written to you. Sometimes you will even write love letters or messages to each other. They will be on your mind often throughout each day. You live with anticipation of being with them.

When you love someone, you will enjoy doing things for them. You will want to do things that are pleasing to them. Other people will be able to tell that you love this person by the way you talk about them and the way you treat them. You will want to treat them with honor and respect and not do anything which would be degrading to them. You would not want to hurt them in any way - physically or emotionally.

When you love someone, you would appreciate what they do for you. You would thank them often. You would praise them for who they are, for what they mean to you, and for how they have enhanced your life.

Finally, you would tell them often "I Love You!"

Relationships

RELATIONSHIPS
By Brooks A. Harris

In the beginning when God created mankind, He created man in His image. Man was to be an example of God to all His creation. Mankind - the human race - was given dominion over all of God’s creation - nature. Humans were to be God’s visible representatives, ruling creation as God would rule it.


Before mankind sinned, by rebelling against God’s command, God and mankind had the ultimate loving, caring relationship. Mankind was created to be in relationship with God. The "created" was to continue a relationship of love and trust with the "Creator." But ever since man broke off his relationship with God by not trusting God, mankind has had difficulty maintaining proper relationships with God and with each other.


Our relationships - with God, with the world, and with one another - have been flawed and corrupted. Such breakdown in relationships are demonstrated by: the development of other religions, wars and conflicts between nations, the widespread breakdown of the Family (divorce, unwed mothers, single parent families, etc.), and crimes against each other (our not obeying God’s commandments).


Although God knew we would rebel and always have relationship problems, this was not His ultimate design and is not the way He wants us to live today. Throughout the Bible, it tells us how people are to relate to God and to each other. The Bible tells us how to relate to our parents, our children, our spouses, our neighbors, our government, and our God.


God wants us to learn to get along with each other, to love each other, and to care for each other. God loves each of us, wants each of us to love Him, and wants our loving relationship (God to us and us to Him) to be an example of how we are to love others. I believe that God’s ultimate goal for mankind is that we learn to love each other and learn to develop proper relationships with each other. We find this very difficult, living in a flawed corrupted world with unloving people. But I believe that the more you practice love and concern for others, the better prepared you will be to live in God’s earthly kingdom now and God’s eternal heavenly kingdom to come.

How To Love Your Lord

HOW TO LOVE YOUR LORD

In 1 Corinthians 13:13 it tells us that faith, hope and love abide in us but the greatest of these is love. Although faith and hope will no longer be needed once we are in heaven with God, love will endure forever. God wants His love for us to be an example of how we should love others - unconditionally and sacrificially. He also wants our love for Him to be an example of how we are to love others. In time, all of God’s people will be expected to love each other forever.

The Bible tells us that God loves us, but how can we love God? In Matthew 22:37 it states "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." So how do we show love for someone? When you read the following article, think about your relationship with your spouse, your family, your friends, your neighbors and your Lord, God. Read the article a few times, each time with a different relationship in mind.

When you love someone, you want to be with them often. You want to communicate with them - in person, on the phone, or writing them and reading their words written to you. Sometimes you will even write love letters or messages to each other. They will be on your mind often throughout each day. You live with anticipation of being with them. (When you love God you will look forward to communicating with Him. Unlike with other relationships, God is always with us in spirit, so we can talk to Him in prayer at any time. He talks to us occasionally through our thoughts but often through His written word - the Holy Bible. It has been said that the Bible is one long love letter written to us showing us how God loves and cares for us. John 3:16 even states "God so loved the world [us] that He gave [us] His only begotten Son... .")

When you love someone, you will enjoy doing things for them. You will want to do things that are pleasing to them. Other people will be able to tell that you love this person by the way you talk about them and the way you treat them. You will want to treat them with honor and respect and not do anything which would be degrading to them. You would not want to hurt them in any way - physically or emotionally. (We show are love for God by keeping His commandments - showing respect for Him and other people. We are to willingly help others who are in need. If you truly love God, you will want to tell others about Him and you will watch how you use His name and try not to do anything that is displeasing to Him.)

When you love someone, you would appreciate what they do for you. You would thank them often. You would praise them for who they are, for what they mean to you, and for how they have enhanced your life. (Through our prayers, we show our appreciation for God and for the many blessings He has given us.) Finally, you would tell them often "I Love You!"

How To Love Your Neighbor

HOW TO LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR
(Your friends, coworkers, aquaintenances, etc.)
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God designed and created each person to be very different and each lacking in certain characteristics and abilities so they would need each other. Some people are shy while others are outgoing; some are organized and others unorganized; some work well with other people while others work well alone; some are leaders and others are followers; some are self-motivated while others need to be encouraged; some like helping others while others don't. We need to depend on each other, but it usually takes time for people to develop trust and respect for each other.

If people do not trust or respect you, it is because they do not know you well enough yet or you have demonstrated reasons for them not to. To earn respect from others, you must show respect to others. If you lie to people, steal from them, talk bad about people behind their back, sneakily do things to people behind their back, or take advantage of others, you will not be trusted or respected. When others treat you that way, it makes it uncomfortable and difficult to be around them too. Why do people treat others unfairly, say or do mean things to others, or take advantage of others? They are usually selfish and expect to get their own way. When problems arise between people they are usually a result of selfishness or poor comunication.

Good communication with each other is the key to any relationship. Do not assume others know what you want or you know what they want. You cannot expect each person to have the same abilities and thought processes. Don't expect others to know what you are thinking. Realize that no one can read minds and don't assume that you know what others are thinking either. Making wrong assumptions causes problems and hurt feelings. Also respect the views of others. Others are not neccesarily wrong if their way is not your way. There is often more than one way to take care of a problem. Arguments often arise when people do not get their way. They fail to be sympathetic and understanding of the other persons point of view.

Avoid complaining to others when you have a problem with someone else. Try to confront the person you have a problem with. Before or when you present a complaint to others, try to see their point of view and be ready to calmly discuss possible solutions. Try to go through a problem solving process before you confront them. Identify the problem and possible causes, and think of possible solutions. When you discuss things with them, avoid distractions as TV, radio, and other people. Do not yell and avoid hurtful words. Give each other time to think.

If someone has a complaint, be honest with yourself - is it a valid complaint? If it is not, ask "why do they think that way?" Try to uncover misunderstandings and defuse rumors. For someone to see your point of view, understand the problem, and decide to make a change, it takes time, desire and effort. To maintain strong relationships, people must be willing to admit their mistakes and be willing to change. Those who are wronged must be willing to forgive too.

Remember "The Golden Rule" - treat others as you want to be treated. Get used to apologizing and saying "I'm sorry" when you have done something wrong. We all make mistakes and we should take responsibility for them. On the other hand it makes it easier for others to apologize if you will listen and try to accept their apology. Although it may be embarrassing to you, others will appreciate you admitting to your mistakes and sincerely apologizing for them and your making an effort to correct the problem and making an effort to avoid making the same mistake in the future. This can improve trust, appreciation and respect for you and open communications between you and others. It is easy to go back to the same old habits if you do not work hard to develop good healthy habits. If you have difficulty remembering certain things, decide how you would like to be reminded without getting upset then discuss it with others. Figure out ways to remind yourself as with notes, acronyms, calendars, a friend, string on your finger, rubber band on your wrist, alarms, list on door knob or car seat, etc. whatever works.

Learn to appreciate others. Put yourself in their shoes for a day or more. Let your spouse or a coworker take a day, weekend, or week long trip while you do their chores. Could you do all that they do for you? What would your life be like if they were no longer with you? What do they do to make your life easier and more enjoyable? Stop and really think about these questions. Begin helping each other and share more chores.

We often begin to take others for granted and fail to appreciate what they do for us. Show appreciation for even the little things others do for you. It is much easier to complain and find fault in others than to look for the good in people and compliment them. Thank others often and find ways to compliment them every day -how they look, how good a job they are doing, etc. Don't wait for them to make the first move. Start showing appreciation for them and thank them and see how they begin to react. Something will eventually change.

Treat your friends like you would when you first meet someone. If this were a new friend and they did things for you, wouldn't you be thankful and want to show them your appreciation. This is why many friendships end. When a person no longer feels appreciated or loved, they will eventually gravitate toward others who treat them with respect, compliment them, make them feel appreciated and loved. The next thing you know they want to be with others instead of you. Relationships are like plants, if you take time and feed them they can grow but if you neglect them they will die.

How To Love Your Spouse

HOW TO LOVE YOUR SPOUSE
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How do you know if you truly love someone or if someone truly loves you? How do you show your love for someone else? We can learn much about love from the Holy Bible. God and Jesus set the perfect example for us. Many verses in the Bible talk about love.

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From the very beginning of man's existence, God has loved mankind and each individual person who has ever lived. Like us, God wants love in return from those whom He loves. But God knows that for love to be true it has to be each person's personal decision to love Him. So God has given each person "free will" to be able to decide on their own, whether they want to love or not. No one can be forced to love someone else, for this would not be true love. Therefore you cannot force anyone to love you and no one can force you to love them either. We must all decide on our own who we want to love.

True love is unconditional. Although God may dislike what we do - our sinful acts and thoughts - He still loves us for who we are. Unconditional love is often seen between a parent and their child, but how often is it seen between a spouse and their spouse? Can you forgive your spouse like you can your child? Can you forgive their past? Will you be able to forgive their future? Remember your wedding vows "...for better or for worse... ." This was a promise you made to your spouse unconditionally.

True love is sacrificial. John 3:16 states "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life." Jesus willingly gave His life on the cross so all who believed in Him could have their sins forgiven so they could have eternal life in heaven. While alive on earth , Jesus constantly, unselfishly, and generously did many things for others. He expected nothing in return. How often do you sacrifice yourself for others especially for your spouse? How often do you not do something you enjoy just so you can spend time with your spouse (or kids) or so you can do what they enjoy doing? How often does your spouse miss doing what he/she enjoys doing just so you (or your kids) can do what you (or they) enjoy doing?

Chapter 13 of 1Corinthians in the Bible has been called "The Love Chapter." It explains how important love is, what it is, and what it is not. Love is very important to God. It has been stated that "God is Love." My understanding is that we were put on this earth to do one thing and that is "To Prepare For Eternity" by doing two things. First we must learn to love and respect our Creator God and our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Second we must learn to love and respect our neighbors which includes all other people but most importantly our spouse. The marriage between a man and a woman was an institution designed and created by God beginning with the very first couple - Adam and Eve. It was God's intention for man to eventually leave his parents and cleave to his wife to become one in union with each other. God designed and created men and women to be very different and each lacking in certain characteristics and abilities so they would need each other to make each person complete. They need to depend on each other until death do they part. Children need to depend on their parents until they themselves are married. It is very important for spouses to demonstrate true love (not sex) in front of their children. If spouses show true love for each other, children feel more comfortable, protected and loved themselves. When spouses demonstrate true love for one another and for their children, this promotes a healthier, more secure family. Once your children are married they develop their own union and can develop their own healthy family. I have heard it said that marrying the right person will determine 90% of your happiness throughout the rest of your life. So show your children how to love and teach them to look for a mate who has had a similar upbringing. Although Christians still have problems, disagree, agrue and occasionally get divorced, a Christian should marry another Christian who has similar moral and ethical values. Even the Bible says not to yoke a believer with a non-believer.

Verses 4 - 7 of 1 Corinthians Chapter 13 says "Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things." For true love to survive and grow it takes work and sacrifice from each person. True love has to have time to grow. You will go through several stages (ups and downs) in your relationship before you develop the joy of mature love. Your spouse should be your best friend, someone you can trust to share your concerns. Spend quality time with each other. What you do with your time together is more important than the amount of time you spend together.

Find out what each other likes and enjoys doing. Regularly find time to do these things together and occasionally to free up time for your spouse to enjoy time by themself (away from stressful situations and maybe even you). Each person should make a list of "What I Would Like." List small gifts you would like as types of candy, cologne/perfume, flowers, drinks, clothing (with sizes and maybe colors), collectables, etc. Also list holidays and special days and dates which you would like to get a card &/or gift. Also list where you would like to go for a night out, a day trip, a weekend trip, and vacations. List activities you would like to do by yourself, with your spouse, with friends, and with your family, such as a day spa, movies, certain restaurants, bowling, dancing, skating, hunting, fishing, shopping, etc. Update this list periodically and use it as a gift idea list (very helpful for men) and to make plans together.

Good communication with each other is the key to any relationship. Do not assume your spouse knows what you want or you know what they want. Many men are clueless to what their wives need and desire even after many subtle hints throughout the year. Women often see this as their husband being unthoughtful and uncaring. But remember that men and women are different and spouses are different. You cannot expect each person to have the same abilities and thought processes. Women, especially those who raise children, are often very aware of what their family's needs are. Often men do not realize how important their wives feel it is that their husbands know what they want and that they remember. If one of you has difficulty remembering certain things, decide together how to be reminded without either person getting upset. Figure out ways to remind yourself as with notes, calendars, a friend, string on your finger, rubber band on your wrist, alarms, list on door knob or car seat, etc. whatever works.

Don't expect your spouse to know what you are thinking. Realize that no one can read minds and don't assume that you know what others are thinking either. Making wrong assumptions causes problems and hurt feelings. Also respect the views of others. Others are not neccesarily wrong if their way is not your way. There is often more than one way to take care of a problem. Before or when you present a complaint to your spouse, try to see their point of view and be ready to calmly discuss possible solutions. When you discuss things with your spouse, avoid distractions as TV, radio, and kids. Do not yell and avoid hurtful words. Remember "The Golden Rule" - treat others as you want to be treated. Get used to apologizing and saying "I'm sorry" when you have done something wrong. We all make mistakes and we should take responsibility for them. On the other hand it makes it easier for your spouse to apologize if you will listen and try to accept their apology. Although it may be embarrassing to you, your spouse and kids will appreciate you admitting to your mistakes and apologizing for them and your making an effort to correct the problem and making an effort to avoid making the same mistake in the future. This can improve trust and respect for you and open communications between you and your family members.

Learn to appreciate your spouse. Put yourself in your spouses shoes for a day or more. Let your spouse take a day, weekend, or week long trip while you do their household chores. Could you do all that they do for you? What would your life be like if your spouse were no longer with you? What does your spouse do to make your life easier and more enjoyable? Stop and really think about these questions. Begin helping each other out around the house and share more chores.

We often begin to take our spouse for granted and fail to appreciate what they do for us. Show appreciation for even the little things your spouse does for you. It is much easier to complain and find fault in others than to look for the good in people and compliment them. Thank your spouse often and find ways to compliment them every day -how they look, the meal they prepared, how the house or yard looks, etc. Don't wait for your spouse to make the first move. Start showing appreciation to your spouse and thank them and see how they begin to react. Something will eventually change. Either this marriage will grow or you will be better prepared for the next if it doesn't. Unless it is physically dangerous for you to stay, it is often better to try to fix the marriage you are in now than to have to deal with all the complications and heartache of a divorce, then have to try and see if another marriage will work later.

Treat your spouse like you did when you first started dating. If this were a new friend you cared for and they did things for you, wouldn't you be thankful and want to show them your appreciation. This is why many marriages end in a divorce. A spouse no longer feels appreciated or loved, then someone else begins to treat them with respect, compliments them, makes them feel appreciated and loved. The next thing you know that person is the person they now want to be with instead of their spouse. But if they do not learn how to show their love, the cycle will continue. Don't let co-workers or friends of the opposite sex get too personal with you especially if you are having problems with your spouse since this may lead to romantic temptations. So learn to love the spouse you have now and avoid unneccesary heartaches. Relationships are like plants, if you take time and feed them they can grow but if you neglect them they will die. Although it may seem silly to you, spouses who truly love each other will want to touch each other (hold hands, hug and kiss) and tell each other "I love you" (and mean it).

Sex is an important part of the marriage relationship. It was designed and created by God to be a special way for a husband and his wife to bond. Respect your spouses concerns about sex. Discuss likes and dislikes. Make it enjoyable for both of you. Make it something you both look forward to. If a woman does not feel loved, she probably will not want or enjoy sex. So practice loving each other out of bed before making love in bed. Sexual urges are normal and if unfulfilled by one spouse the other spouse will be tempted to fulfill it another way. So try to fulfill each others needs. Sex outside marriage destroys that special bond and damages the marital relationship. Once married, your body belongs to each other. Neither of you has the right to give your body to anyone else. A few minutes of lustful fulfilment can cause a lifetime of heartache, pain, suffering, and grief. Think of all the painful consequences infidelity can cause to you, your spouse, your family, your friendships and lifestyle. How would you feel if your spouse shared their body with someone else? Could that special bond you once shared ever be the same?

What you put in your mind influences what you think, say and do. Trash In - Trash Out! Change your attitude and point of view by changing what you view and listen to. So, get rid of all pornograghy in your life such as magazines, internet, movies, and even TV shows, discussions with your friends and romance novels. Stop thinking sexual or romantic thoughts about any other person than your spouse. Get rid of anything that causes sexual desires for another person and wrong expectations (as how someone should look or perform). Do this and watch your attraction and desire for your spouse grow. Also look for inspirational and encouraging music, movies, books and tapes that teach such things as the differences in how men and women think such as "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus", by John Gray, Ph.D. (get the short 90 minute cassette-tape version and listen to it together). Such information will help each of you realize and appreciate many differences between the two of you and help you understand why your spouse may be acting and thinking the way they do. Watch the 2008 movie "FIREPROOF" with Kirk Cameron. It is an excellent movie which deals with several common marital problems as discussed in this handout. You can also look for information on how to be more romantic. This does not come naturally especially for many men; they have to really work at it and their spouse needs to realize this and show appreciation for their often bumbled efforts.

The old sayings - "If you don't use it, you'll lose it" and "We learn by repetition" suggest that you should review such information as this from time to time to refresh your memory so you can strengthen your relationships. Make a list of ideas to try. Begin practicing one or two ideas, review your list every week to check your progress, then add more ideas. To see change it takes time, desire and effort. It is easy to go back to the same old habits if you do not work hard to develop good healthy habits. Pray often by yourself and/or with your spouse for God to strengthen your relationship and teach you how to love your spouse.